He Says: Ok, I can envision an onslaught of further comments arguing that interracial couples need to deal with more challenges than any “regular” couples will – and I will definitely agree.

      When my brother brought home his then girlfriend – now fiancée - to introduce to the family, I remembered how my mom went into this whole lecture on the difficulties of interracial relationships. See, like me, my brother’s a Malay/Muslim and his girlfriend, a Catholic Eurasian. But after years of discussion and proving themselves ready to face the challenges, my parents relented and by the end of the year, I’ll get myself a sister-in-law.

      Supposing then, like my brother, the relationship develops into an interracial marriage, I concur that the problems facing them are even bigger than the dating stages. Questions about religion, like who should convert when both families are staunchly religious, or which culture the offspring should follow will unfailingly arise.

      However, I strongly believe that by overcoming these differences, interracial relationships become stronger and develop that much-needed stability.

      She Says: See, when it comes to meeting each other’s parents, an integral part to the relationship's success is getting them to like him. Yet, if they come from a generation where they grew up in an age of racial tension, prejudices will become more pronounced.

      In addition, with the arrival of their child's partner threatening to nullify the cultural values and social mores they’ve tried to inculcate in their offspring for years, there is sufficient reason to object to the relationship. They may have no qualms of making their disapproval known to him.      

      It pans out to be very tiring and trying for those involved, trying to keep their heads above the water. Events turn around such that the girl has to pander to both her parents as well as his needs, since it’s the girl’s so-called “duty” to be the soothsayer and make things seem all right again.

      He Says: Wait a minute, the females are not the only ones who have the responsibility. In today’s world, the burden lies equally on the shoulders of both the people in a relationship. It's no longer just one sided.

      Even guys have to impress the parents of the girl. Even guys have to ensure the girl’s parents that he is capable of looking after their precious daughter. This process is as it is difficult, and being in an interracial relationship makes things a lot more complicated. One of the biggest difficulties being that of religious affiliations.

      She Says: True, while being of a particular race does not necessary indicate which faith you are, it is common to think that dating inter-racially means that you date inter-religiously, and that is where potential landmines have to be navigated carefully.

      One’s religion can be so closely tied that it becomes an extension of who they are; it becomes their identity. And that issue ups a notch to being a little more complex and difficult to sidestep.

      He may be Christian and strongly believes that I need to be saved, but I’d much rather be left alone to languish in hell for being an unbeliever. She thinks that his practices are archaic and overly traditional but he feels that she should at least be an agnostic, and not a complete atheist.
     
      Yet whatever the case is, it would appear that the female side has to start with the first stride, as opposed to the guy making the first move. Be it when it comes to learning about another’s faith or trying to balance both her parents and partner, there is a certain amount of sacrifice that she has to give out – there is no two ways, nor alternative route. Someone has got to give, something has to budge.